Where is it I truly Belong?

Where is it I Truly Belong?

I wander through the halls, going unnoticed. Day to day, the calls of, “Hey, freak with the blue eyes!” falls upon deaf ears as does the laughter that follows. I am nothing but a shadow of my sisters—my normal, beautiful popular sisters. They are the normal ones. I watch them with envy, because they don’t get called names or is told they’re a walking freak show. I envy their moss colored eyes and their wheat colored hair.

            I am not normal. I am far from. I take after my demonic father, more that my other were father. I guess the only freak in my family is myself. Who has black and red natural hair? Who has powder blue eyes with white’s as pupils? Nothing comes normal or easy for me. No matter how hard I try, I just stopped caring. Freak, Monster, Horror Show, are always written on my locker. I eat lunch in the girl’s bathroom, because nobody wants to be my friend or hang out with me. Everybody is afraid of what I am, and won’t look past my physical features to try and get to know the person that I am.

            Is this what Frankenstein felt like when Victor had abandoned him? Left alone and scared, unknowing in this cruel, desolate world where nobody understands? Is that what I am? Is that what I am reduced down too? Frankenstein’s monster? I feel alone, abandoned,, out of place with the rest of the world. Who wants to be friends with a monster? My own sisters are afraid of me. They try, I know, to include me in things, to try and take me out with them, but I told them to stop trying. Who wants to be seen with a freak? My only companions are my books Frankenstein taught himself how to read and try to blend in by watching the very people that hated him the most. The very people that were afraid of him because they only saw him as a monster. Poor Frankenstein, innocent, scared, terrified, and betrayed. Do I feel like any of those things? My dad taught me how to read and write, they tried to give me a normal childhood. They tried to make me feel normal.

            It was no use. Ever since I was a child, I’ve heard the whispers and I’ve seen the glances, felt the glares and the frightened looks. A monster like myself should not be able to exist, I look like something out of a horror movie, or a freak show, and yet, my parents still love me. A parents love is unconditional my papa told me. People are afraid of what they don’t understand. Why can’t I look like them? I asked this is your normal my father said, this is who you are. Embrace it. How can embrace something I hate? Maybe I should just leave, like Frankenstein did, and wander the earth and the seven seas, trying to find his place in the world.

            I am alone, despite being in a family that loves me. I am in pain, but my emotions harden and I don’t care for other people. I s that what makes me a monster?  Maybe I’ll never find my place in the world. I watch my sisters laugh and have fun, I watch my family have fun. I stay away, for fear of ruining their fun, their happiness. I think I’ll take my leave now. I’ll go like Frankenstein did and try to find a place to belong, forever living in the shadows of humanity. Always watching, always silent. My cousins are half-demons, but unlike me, they do not have my eyes. They can disguise themselves as humans and be normal.

            My name is Lemon Lima, and here I go, forever wandering, trying to find out where it is I truly belong.