Thursday, January 31, 2013

Mara



My dearest Mara, 


If you’re reading this, I’m probably dead. I'm deeply sorry for how I treated you. It wasn't right and you deserved better... when you left, I locked myself away into the demon counsel. Sleep avoided me until my body gave out. I figured that you would come back to me. When you didn't, I realized that I fucked up. But my pride refused to let me admit what a fucking bitch I was. I hope that you and our child will be happy. I left the house and everything in it to you. 
I know that you wanted to get married… But I didn’t want you to marry a monster who treated you like shit. I saw how hurt you were when I would come back smelling of other women and nearly verbally abusing you… I wasn’t ready for a mate yet. I didn’t know how to take care of another person. I joined the demon counsel when I was 17 and I had to shut down every emotion (except anger) and be mentally and physically strong. Then you came along and I thought that if I barked orders at you, you’d just take it and fight back. You were fragile going into our relationship and I just made it worse. I know it sounds like a bunch of excuses, but it’s the truth.
Our child will be just as beautiful as you are, my saving grace. I know that you tried to keep our relationship growing and strong, but I wasn’t very willing… I did love you, Tamara… When you left me, after a few days, I realized that you weren’t coming back to me… I sat on the couch and for the first time in a long time, I cried. I sobbed for hours, holding your shirt you forgot and your picture. Trying to hold onto the precious memories that we had made. I didn’t know what else to do so I drank myself to death.
I’m sorry to leave you behind. What I did was fucking selfish… Then again, that’s me, I guess. Live on for our precious child, baby. I’m not able to physically be there, but I will always be watching over you. If we have a son, name him Devril Lucian James…please? I will always love you. I’m just sorry I didn’t treat you better.

Love always and forever,
Ayva

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Ayva

Baby,
       You're much better than anyone I had before. And I'm not leaving you just because you're not affectionate after sex. I've had to learn to be strong.
       Baby... You're trying just by letting me stay with you, by loving me... I see how you look at me when you think I'm not looking, how much love there is in your eyes...
       I never said I wouldn't have my weak moments, Ayva, just that you wouldn't have to deal with them.
       Honestly... I sort of did, too. But I do love you.
Love,
Tamara
 
 
PS. I'm not leaving you.

'Mara

Tamara,

You deserve better than me. I'm not a very affectionate person. After sex, I'll push you away or leave. I know that you're strong...

I'm not trying very hard... You're so fucking beautiful and sexy and caring... I couldn't stand if something happened to you. That's why I distance myself... But I'm hurting you in the process.

I came home early and found you up in our bed crying over me. You didn't know that I was there. I never said loving me was going to be easy.

To be honest, when I first met you, I though tall you were was a fuck toy. Somebody I'd fuck and never see again.

I'm ...sorry
Ayva

(P.S.) 

I'll understand if you don't want
to marry me anymore. Just leave
the ring on my desk in my study if you
do change your mind. 

Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Ayva

Baby,
       I don't mind you bossy. You at least explain why. Mean and bitchy? I've seen worse. I know how you feel... But I like knowing you're happy with me, that you love me. And you're the only person I want by my side. As for the nightmares... You've driven them away. They don't even surface when you're stuck with the council.
       I know you won't. And I rather enjoy the sex. I'm happy I did too. New Orleans is so beautiful! And the food! Soooo good! And Ceasar's happy here too.
       I love you so much, baby... I'm finding out more ways to love you all the time. I don't regret loving you, because you treat me so much better than I thought I could ever deserve. And the council... Does take up more of your time than would be fair to our children if we had them now. Maybe in a few years when things have calmed down, but not now.
       My answer is yes to all your questions, baby. Yes, I will always love you. Yes, I will always make you happy. Yes, I will gladly marry you. And I will happily spend forever with you. I'm glad your demon is happy. I mean it when I say I love all of you, demon side included. You deserve to be as happy as you make me.
 Love,
Mara

Mara


‘Mara,
               
                I know that I seem bossy. I know that I seem mean and bitchy, but I’m not. I’m still getting used to having a mate. As time went on, I realized that I can’t…live without you anymore. I need you by my side. I love you, Tamara. I promise to keep your nightmares and fears away. I noticed that you haven’t had any nightmares about Yuri lately.
                I’m not a very easy person to live with sometimes, but like I told you last night: I will NEVER take my anger out on you—maybe sexually, but I will never verbally or physically or mentally abuse you. I’m happy that you agreed to live with me in New Orleans. Even with that yapping, furry pommy mutt! Don’t get me wrong, the dog is okay and I’m happy as all hell he’s housebroken…
                Anyway, I love you more than you will ever know. I know that I may be gone a lot with the counsel and stuff, but I know that you’re back at home, waiting for me. The reason I don’t want kids right away is because well, I’m not ready—(You’d think I would be, considering I grew up in a rather large family and helped take care of the younger kids below me), the council takes up a lot of my time and theirs you. My darling, precious Tamara; my sweet, sexy angel. I don’t know what I did to deserve you. My dad says that about my mom all the time. Even as a half demon, I don’t know how I even deserve you with all the horrible things I’ve had to do.
                “Starting over” with you should be fun. I already asked you to be my mate and you said yes. But ‘Mara, baby…
Would you marry me?
Would you spend the rest of your life with me?
                Would you make me happy and love me forever? I’m not saying that it’ll be easy and all a bed of roses… I want you to be mine. My demon is finally content now… She’s not as bitchy and angry. She’s actually purring now.
I love you. I don’t want to ever lose you, baby.
Love,
Ayva

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Ayva

Lover,
       I know I should be. But I'd much rather be with you. You're the one I love, the one I feel safest with.
       Honestly? I don't mind waiting if you're not ready yet. Maybe, maybe not... I read online that doctors can swap out DNA in sperm and egg cells, so homosexual couples can have children that carry both their DNA. And Sasha... I don't know if he'd be able to produce viable swimmers since he mated Kitty.
       I know, baby. You're nothing like Yuri that way. You're far better, and much better looking, too. I know you'd help take care of our baby, no matter what. I love you too.
       I'm happy with you, Ayva. Trust me.
Love,
Tamara

Tamara

'Mara,

You should be with someone who can give you kids. Someone who can love you.
I won't be ready for kids for a few more years yet... You want them now. I can't give you that and I don't want to keep you waiting... You'd look so beautiful with that pregnant glow around you, baby... You wouldn't be carrying my child. You'd be carrying somebody else's. I don't know how I feel about that-- but that's the only way for you to get pregnant. Maybe Sasha would be willing to donate his sperm or something.

The counsel has been keeping me very busy. I'm short-tempered, I have a short fuse. I will never take my anger out on you. EVER. I want you to be happy, baby. I don't want to deny you motherhood if you want it so bad and I don't want to see you deny yourself something just because I don't want it. If you did get pregnant, yes, I would help you with the child. I..love you.

Don't deny yourself the chance to be a mother, Tamara. Be happy.

Love,
Ayva

Sunday, January 20, 2013

Kat

My Angel,

I hope that you got the necklace. I'm sorry for being on the road so much, but I hope you like the necklace. I truly do miss you, lover. The bed is cold without you in it. You're always going to me my angel... My saving grace. If you hadn't come along, I would've probably quit my career and been a pot head. I don't smoke nearly as much pot as I did before and you make me smile. You brought me into the light again and for that, I thank you. We have a beautiful daughter together. Amber is truly smart and funny. She gets her funniness from you.

I'll be back soon, I promise. It's not home without you. I will always love you--even when you're with the others. It makes our bond stronger when you come home to me. Strengthens our bond when we make love... Seeing the pleasure overtake you... It takes my breath away.

Remember, Angel, I'm not that far away. I'm always with you. In your heart.

Love always and forever,
Toby

Saturday, January 19, 2013

Katie


Katie
By: Rio


                Hi, I’m Katie! I’m 14 and I’m in the 8th grade. I have red hair and blue eyes with a dust of freckles on my face. When I was younger, I looked just like my mother, Tasha (Or Black Widow). She’s Russian and very pretty. I started to “speak” Russian when I was 3 years old and I can fluently speak it. I started learning how to write it when I was 3 also. I’m very naturally curious and always looking for an adventure or to go exploring. I love to be outdoors and I don’t like being inside for very long. I love to talk with my friends and just hang out. I love challenges. I love to do crossword puzzles and anything that challenges my mind. I’m very easy going and love to do almost anything. My favorite thing is to work on hair (Cutting, coloring, styling, etc.). My favorite subject(s) in school are science and art. My favorite song is “Treason” by Leps and Victoria Elijah. It’s in Russian and I have it playing almost all the time on my iPod. When I grow up, I don’t know what I want to be.
                My sister, Krissy (we’re 3 years apart. I’m 14 and she’s 16) is studying abroad in Japan. We share a room, we have since we were little kids. The color of our room is soft pastel colors with posters and pictures of friends and family. We each have our “side”. Krissy’s side has her bed, desk, dresser, small flat screen, stereo, posters and pictures of friends and family. Her covers have red and gold on them, whereas in mine have purple and a hint of pink. Krissy and I don’t really get into fights—like most siblings would if they had to share a room with their younger sibling. We have a younger brother, CJ (Clint Junior) and two older siblings, Anya lives in Spain and Nik lives in Miami. Our dad told us that Anya used to be obsessed with archery just like Krissy, but she never stuck with it. Krissy, on the other hand, is very good at archery (she’s been doing it since she was 2). She’s almost as good as our dad—who’s a SHIELD agent (along with our mom, Tasha). His name is ‘Hawkeye’. They always say that they “See things better from a distance.”
                Anyway, what about me? I never had an interest in archery. I did take martial arts lessons, though. I’m still taking them. My favorite past time is doing mental challenges. I love to do Sudoku puzzles. I’m good at math, but I’m not great. I’m also good with money. All three of us kids have a bank account. Krissy has a debit card and seeing as I’m still 14; I just carry cash (or what I need in terms of cash). Sometimes, when I’m working on my school work and if I’m in a hurry, it’s actually faster for me to write in Russian than it is in English. When I do that, my teachers always laugh and tell me just write the answer in English and I still get full credit (unless I get it wrong or something). That’s another thing: I study hard. If I don’t understand something, then I ask for help. The good thing about playing Russian music in mine and Krissy’s room is that she understands Russian also. I’m very close to my sister and our ‘mama’. (‘Mama’ is Tasha and ‘Mom’ is Piper)
                I love to play the piano. Sometimes if I’m stressed or having a bad day, you’ll find me playing something on it; it’s my way of releasing whatever has been going on that day. I love to write poetry also. Sometimes I write it in both English and Russian. Anyway, like I said before, I love to hang out with my friends. We’d hang out at the mall or at their houses. We’re all ‘nerds’ in our own way. I’m the star of the swim team and I love to play basketball and soccer.
                It’s too quiet without Krissy here. I miss her. Our room feels…empty without her in it. Anyway, It’s Friday night (no school on Monday thanks to MLK Jr. Day). I love sleeping in. But then again, who doesn’t? Anyway, I’ll write more tomorrow. I’m tired. Night! 

Saturday, January 12, 2013

Sam

Sam,
       I'm not sorry about what we went through back then. It strengthened what we have, Darlin'. I'm glad we made it through the detox, as painful as it was for both of us. I trust you because you've learned from what happened... From the pain...
       That last time... Was pure hell... I had to practically beg Vince for time to come home to you... And he made it damn hard. But it did strengthen the bond.
       I'm glad it's in the past, too. And those times you relapsed... We both hated it.
       I love you too. And I will always stay with you. You're my heart, darlin', and you always will be.
Love always and forever,
Mark

Mark


I’m sorry I was so fucked up back then… Hurting you the way I did… Stealing, lying… cheating… You even took time off the road to make sure I stayed alive… Detoxing was the worst part… All that pain… I regret hurting you the way I did… Stealing from you… I’m surprised that you trust me… I didn’t care about my life or how I hurt anybody else…
I love you… I think our bond got stronger when I finally begged for help… That last time I detoxed… You were overseas and Glenn called you… You could hear me screaming and begging in the background… Sobbing in pain… You couldn’t get too me…
But that’s in the past now… I’m glad it is… Sure, I relapsed a few times…
Anyway, I just thought that I would tell you that I love you… We haven’t been arguing as often as we used too… Been staying with me…

I love you, Deadman.
Love,
Sam

Sunday, January 6, 2013

Sam,
       I'm glad you like the stupid shit I did. At least someone outside of my sister did.
       Til we meet again, Sam.
Shan

Shan


Shannon,

                You know, I always did love the…quirky things that you did. How you’d do anything to make me laugh or sticking carrots up your nose on that dare from Jeff. I love seeing you in your tattoo shop, doing what you love to do. I’m sorry that we could never work out… Ana’s a very beautiful young women and she has two beautiful daughters—our grandchildren… I loved you as the Prince of Punk, I loved you as Shannon Moore, and I will always love you as just your crazy ass self.
                This isn’t goodbye. It’s just… until we see each other again.

Love,
Sam

Saturday, January 5, 2013

Mark

I'm sorry, Mark... While you were away, I gave Kimber up for adoption...

Sam

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

Thena


Athena
By: Samwise

            Hi! My name’s Athena, though most people call me ‘Thena. Most kids hate the name their parents give them, but I love mine. I’m obviously named after the Greek Goddess. She’s the Goddess of wisdom, courage, inspiration, civilization, law and justice, just warfare, mathematics, strength, strategy, the arts, crafts, and skill. Which is totally cool (Yes, I had to Google it. Shut up!). I have short brown hair and bluish/green eyes and I have ADHD. Which stands for Attention Deficit Hyper Disorder; against popular belief, we can be in a normal classroom. I like to fidget and keeping my hands busy. My parents put me on Ritalin and I love to draw. I get so absorbed in my art—the only thing (besides reading/writing) to keep me still.
            I’m far from being popular and I’ll be a freshmen at _____________. Where seniors rule, jocks are plenty, and nobody cares about you; high school is all about image and the “next big thing”. Personally, I don’t really care—I just hope I don’t get beaten up or thrown into a garbage. Tomorrow is the first day of high school; I wonder what it’ll be like. Well, on the flip side, my mom is pregnant again. I’m hoping for a girl; I told my dad I liked the name Artemis—another Greek Goddess and sister to Athena! I glanced over at my desk to find an empty notebook laying on the top. Reaching over, I snagged it and a pen. I opened to a new page and began to write.
December 20th
          Well, we still don’t know what gender you are, but I guess that’s alright. I’m your older sister, Athena. This journal (NOT A DIARY!) is for your eyes only, understand? For now, you’re still a little…foreign thing inside our mom’s belly. She’s really pretty and our dad is pretty handsome. He’s a farmer and owns several five star restaurants across the States. I should probably mention that our mom isn’t from earth. She’s from a place called Asgard. But that’s another story for another time.
            With me being on Winter break (They couldn’t say Christmas because it might offend people’s religious beliefs), I’ll have a lot more time on my hands. Mom is becoming a better cook every day! I get good grades—I just kind of suck at taking tests, y’know? Maybe I want to be an editor when I grow up…or maybe an artist. I don’t think I’ll be starving… (Ha-ha…Get it? Starving artist?) Soon enough, I fell asleep.
            I awoke to the smell of bacon and pancakes. The first day of high school. I was excited, yet terrified. After showering and dressing, I made my way downstairs to find my mom sitting at the island, flipping through a magazine. My dad was at the table, drinking his coffee and flipping through the paper.
            “Want some breakfast?” she asked as I nodded. Mom always made chocolate chip pancakes and bacon on the first day of school. I sat at the table and slowly ate my breakfast.
I must warn you, smelly. Even though the pancakes are good, you have to be careful of those chocolate chips. They’re hot as heck and you could burn your lip off!
After I had my breakfast, I made my way to the bus stop. I was the first one there; I should have brought a book or something—but then that would have been a bad idea because then I would’ve been painted as a nerd. A few minutes later, a few other freshmen started to show up—kids I recognized from middle school.
“’Thena!” A voice called out as I looked over. Oh no. It’s Alaska. Of course, that’s not his real name. His real name is Ernie Backlaw. Everybody calls him Alaska because that’s where he moved from. He likes to talk on and on and on and on! Nobody likes him because he can get really annoying really fast.
“Are you nervous? I’m not nervous…Well, I am a little nervous. It’s a new year! High school, can you believe it? I can’t believe it!” And on he rambled.
The bus pulled up and I realized that it’ll be full of upperclassmen. As I got on, I made the mistake of sitting in the front. The jocks came by and swatted me over the head—granted it was lightly (Surprisingly). I pulled out my notebook;
Let me tell you a few things about the bus, you foreign object. Here’s my tidbit: The bus has three sections: Front, middle, and back. The back is for the popular kids. The middle is for the nerds/geeks/losers, and the front is for the quiet/special needs/all the seats are taken and nobody wants to share kids. I usually get smacked in the head every morning from popular football star Ryan Johnson. Let me tell you a few things about Ryan: First off, he’s the star quarter back for the football team.  Second of all, he’s a grade above me—meaning he’s in 10th grade. Third, his sister is on the cheerleading squad. Her name is Allison. She’s in the same grade as I am. Fourth, he’s really cute. Looks can be deceiving, Artemis. Remember that!
By the time I finished writing, we pulled up to the school. Everybody rushed off the bus and it smelt like…something not very pleasant. This school was huge! Of course, homeroom had to be on the far side of the school. Lockers were lined up in the hall and I found mine. Making my way to homeroom, I found out my English teacher is my homeroom teacher. That could be cool. I was the first one to homeroom. He looked up and smiled.
“What’s your name?” He asked
“Calaway, Athena”
“Athena? Hm… Greek Goddess. Very creative” He stated, marking me as here
“My parents thought so too”
When I took a seat in the back of the room, I took out my schedule to look and see what classes I have:
1st: Honors English –Mr. Frank
2nd: Algebra II – Mrs. Thompson
3rd: Pre-AP Biology—Mr. Redd
4th: Lunch
5th: Pre-AP Spanish—Mrs. Lopez
6th: American History—Mr. French
7th: Gym –Mr. Snow
8th: Drawing I—Mrs. Buttons
9th: Band –Mr. Chord
I put my schedule away as the room filled with incoming freshmen and a few before the bell rang again. Once settled, the teacher sat on the edge of his desk.
            “My name is Mr. Frank. I’ll be your homeroom teacher for the next four years. I also teach Honors English as well as AP European Literature”. Hm. European lit…Now that might be fun.
            After homeroom was over, I stayed where I was because the homeroom was in the English room. How awesome is that?
January 1st
Congrats! You’re a girl! Oh. Happy New Year! I knew I was right the entire time! Ha-ha. Let me tell you something, Smelly… Life doesn’t get any easier, so enjoy it on the inside while you can! Once you’re out, you have rules to follow… Though, they won’t really apply to you yet since you’re just a smelly, pooping, crying machine. Mom and dad will make sure you don’t vomit your way out of your crib or anything… If you vomit or spit up on me, I’m chucking you out the window or selling you to the circus!
            Break was nice, but now I’m ready to get back to class. You know how I spent my entire break? Playing football, basketball, and baseball; I watched sports on TV and fought with my dad. I stayed with my grandparents too. What I really wanted was to go to Australia. It’ll be nice to go back to school (Did I just say that?). Means I can get away from my parents for a while. I haven’t been eating all that much lately either. I’m not starving myself; I’m not bulimic; I’m not anorexic either. I just… I don’t know. I’m thin and people tell me I’m beautiful. I am beautiful. I have wavy brown hair and beautiful eyes and a smile to match. I know things; I have a bunch of secrets. I can lie (Doesn’t usually help because my dad knows when I’m lying).
            Going back to school means facing Allison and her goons. Which, to a certain extent, I can handle.
Don’t.Trust.ANYBODY! (Well, except for certain members of your family, but even then). The word is full of backstabbing people. You think you can trust somebody, but then you find out that you really can’t. So, just be careful, alright?
            Well, I’m going to bed. See you in the morning!