Barney

Barney,

                I feel as if a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I guess denying the bond I have with you…Denying how deeply I love and need you, I guess it was seriously driving me batty.

                With your help, I’m starting to feel like my old self again. I’m not in my room as much anymore… I’m out hanging with Oscar—just like I used too. My dad’s practically giggling because I’m talking to him again. Mom’s not worried anymore, either.

                I’m starting to slowly gain back all the weight I’ve lost since the rape. Aunt Sam says that I’ll always look skinny and that I screwed up my metabolism. I’ve been secretly seeing a female therapist, by recommendation of Aunt Sam (both are good friends) and she put me on anxiety pills.

                When you first told me that you loved me, I seriously wanted to believe you. But something inside me told me not too. Well, that voice went away forever. You’ve been really patient with me, Barney… I’m surprised that you didn’t get up and leave forever.

                You make going through the day a little easier. You make getting out of bed a little less hard in the morning. I miss you when you’re not around me. You’re always on my mind. You’re stuck with me, Barney. Forever, Always and into eternity;

                We’ll take it a day at a time, okay? I’m not perfect and can’t be fixed overnight—no matter how much duct tape or bubble gum you use. Just stay by my side, please? I don’t think I can do this by myself anymore.

Love,

Adri